It’s been a while,
since I could hold my head up high
It’s been a while,
since I’ve laid down and cried
and it’s been a while
since I could hold you
wishing it was me who was taking you to the zoo
but I fucked up just like i always do
and all the consequences that I render
six feet from the edge, I said I surrender

its been a while,
since I could say i wasn’t a bad mother, and
it’s been a while,
since I could say I love myself, and
it’s been a while,
since I’ve gone and fucked things up just like i always do
it’s been a while
but all the shit seem to come clear when I’m with you
but I fucked up just like I always do
and the consequences that i render,
has me feeling like a blender

Why must I always feel this way
why can’t you just make this go away
all I ask is for one more peaceful day

it’s been awhile
since I could look at myself the same
and it’s been awhile
since I said I’m sorry
and it’s been awhile
since I saw them ducky faces you used to make
and it’s been awhile
since I’ve had picture of you to take
but I’ve gone and fucked things up just like i always do
please don’t blame this on your father
he did the best he could do for you
But everything I can’t remember is as fuck up as it seems
and all the consequences that I render
six feet from the edge, I said I surrender

It’s been a while
Since I could hold my head up high
and it’s been a while and I’m sorry

written at 6:32p.m
written on May 22, 2010
written for my son Paul J. Herzing the 3rd

This poem was written/submitted by dianna green.